Crazy thing called life

       I think about this blog daily, and every night when I sit in bed nursing E to sleep, I always end up falling asleep right along with her and end up waking up a few hours later with the iPad in my lap waiting for my next blog entry! By that time I set the iPad on the floor and crash back out for the night! (life of a mommy, take sleep when you can get it!) Anyways, life lately has been so incredible! Elliana is still amazing us daily by the new things she learns, faces she makes, and the loads of kisses she blesses us with constantly! 

       Two weeks ago Nicholas Jaymes asked me to be his wife and the way he did it still melts my heart just thinking about it! We had a very low key Friday night and after dinner we were lying on the floor playing and reading with elliana. Nick was across the living room and I saw him hand elliana something to play with and I didn't think anything of it. I saw her play with it for a few minutes and then I heard him say "go give it to mommy" not thinking she would be handing me something so beautiful I just grabbed it and said thank you. After double taking the gorgeous ring she had just handed me I just stared at nick wondering if he was really doing what I thought he was doing and sure enough, he was! This amazing man asked me to spend the rest of my life with him and I couldn't be more excited! I'm excited to have a wedding, to buy a house together & soooo excited to have even more beautiful babies with him!!! 

       Everyday since he proposed Elliana ooo's and ahhh's over my beautiful ring and she spins it around my finger with her sweet little smile! She knows her pretties, so seeing mamas just lights her little face up! Becoming a mom has turned my life upside down in the most wonderful ways and lately I feel like I just need to stop and smell the flowers. The past few weeks we have been going going going, and I begun realizing that I don't want elliana to grow up thinking we rushed through her childhood. I want to let her walk in the grocery store even if it turns my 10 minute quick stop into a 30 minute stroll down the aisles. Letting her stop and look at everything is so worth it to me and I'm vowing to our daughter that that is exactly what I will let her do. Stop and smell the roses and let her lol and ahhh's over all the pretties she sees! :) Seeing how fast these past 14 months have flown by is beginning to scare me because she is no longer a little baby and I need to enjoy every single day she grows and does new things!!

Xo,

NursingBlissSleeplessMama

1 year of nursing.

       I cannot believe my little nursling and I have been a breastfeeding duo for a little over a year now! Where did the last year go?! We are officially into the toddler nursing stage...she wants to play and nurse at the same time! She is walking EVERYWHERE now, talking up a storm (nick and I counted last night and she says 10 words now!) && eating everything in sight! This new stage and I have had a love hate relationship so far because our house isn't 100% baby proof yet which makes my life during the day a tornado! If dada isn't home to be my extra pair of eyes she ends up sneaking away and playing in the toilet 2-3 times a day! Yuck!!

       I can't imagine being done breastfeeding my little rascal! I knew I wanted to breastfeed, but had no idea the love I would have for it! Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would want to breastfeed forever! She is almost 13 months old now (omg I have a 13 month old!!! So crazy to think!) but she nurses anywhere between 4-8 times a day and ALL NIGHT LONG! She nurses more when she is tired, if she falls and just wants to comfort, or if she eats something and wants to wash it down with what she knows...breastmilk! Some people might say if she wants to drink something while she eats why not just give her a sippy cup? She does have a sippy cup that she plays with or drinks water out every once in awhile, but she likes to nurse so who am I to take that comfort away from her! It's like babies and their bottles, my baby's bottle just happens to be attached to my body. 

       People ask me "how long do you plan on nursing her?" And my response has and will always be "until the day she wants to stop". Most people don't realize that nursing is a two-sided relationship. I can't imagine elliana just all of a sudden stopping one day, no warning, no discussion, just done. I would be devastated! My heart would be broken because that's all I've known for the past 13 months! So imagine taking that away from a baby who doesn't understand why she can't have it anymore. If it would be devastating for me I would never want to do that to my baby! So I will let her nurse until we decide that it's best for our family for us to stop.

        Nick and I agree that nursing is the greatest thing for our baby and she will stop when she is ready. And when that time comes we will hopefully have another baby so this mama won't be heartbroken by not having a nursing baby anymore :) of course there are days and nights that I'm exhausted and just want to get stuff done or get a good nights rest without a baby attached to my boob but she won't always be a baby, and i know that before our eyes we will have a sweet little girl who is talking about boys and learning to drive so the sleepless nights and our messy house can stay for awhile because my baby won't always be my baby. 

       The average weaning age for mammals is anywhere between 2 years old and 7 years old so hopefully we still have lots of nursing snuggles to go! No matter what method you chose to feed your baby it ultimately boils down to what works best for your family and this is what works best for ours :) 

       

       We have had a wonderful 1st year as parents and are excited to see the many years to come! Bon voyage baby Ellie, we are stoked to see you grow into the sassy little munchkin you've already started unveiling! 

Xo,

       NursingBlissSleeplessMama

                                

                                           Blue eyed baby doll w/ messy nap hair

 

     

                                              Nursing at "The Big Latch On"

    

                

                                                  Afternoon snuggles

                    

                                 This is why I need an extra pair of eyes now ;)

                    

                                                       Walking everywhere :)

Can I borrow your broom?

       Leaving the house with a baby/toddler is anything but fast...I always assume leaving 30-45 minutes early will be a sufficient enough time to get where we need to go but that is never the case...diapers, wallets, toys, snacks, thank god for breastfeeding because at least I can't forget my boobs! Get everything in my arms, walk to the car, only to realize my keys are still inside the house! Luckily I even forgot to lock the door so I can actually go get my keys and then lock the door! (Nick always laughs at me when he is waiting for 20 min in the car when i tell him all i have to do is grab the diaper bag) This is our daily routine of leaving the house! 

       Eating out is just as fun as this leaving the house routine...maybe even better. We go out to eat maybe 2-3 times a month, and I feel like the need to go out has settled a bit since elliana has become mobile! Not only does our crazy rugrat not want to be held anymore, but try putting her in a high chair, forget it! She either wants to be sitting like a big girl next to her dada or she wants to be roaming from table to table waving at everyone she sees! All of which is fine unless you actually want to eat your meal :) we do like taking her out because she likes to learn and I find that restaurants are a good place to teach all sorts of skills, drinking out of a big girl cup, using utensils, saying pease and thank you and of course we can't forget her quirky little smile she gives to everyone who looks her way! Rice and beans, Elliana's favorite restaurant food! Messy, yummy, and easy for her to feed herself! Except by the time the bill comes nick and I are embarrassed to even look at the floor under Ellie's chair! Afraid of how big the mess might be and feeling like we should borrow a broom to clean it up! We have asked a few times but they always nicely decline and say don't worry about it, but there has also been a few times that the mess has been so bad we couldn't help but laugh and swear to each other that we could never step foot in that restaurant again! 

       We are just getting to the toddler years and I know that this independent stage is only going to get more intense! I've been having a hard time letting my baby grow up, but I know it's going to happen regardless of me liking it or not so I've decided to just enjoy the messes, laugh at what we can't clean up, and let her be the roaming social butterfly that she is! She melts my heart along with her daddy's so we are just going to sit back and watch her personality unfold even more! 

Enjoy the messes my fellow mommies, it keeps getting messier! 

       Xo,

              NursingBlissSleeplessMama

    

                    

                                        Raviolis! Her first time eating in a high chair!

                            

                                                        Ribs all my herself!

                             

                                                        Rice rice & more rice!!

The day of your birth

                                                                                                                  November 2012

                                                 ​ Elliana Madalyn 

                                             The story of your birthday

 

July 30th came and gone, and as uncomfortable as I was, I knew you weren’t ready to make your arrival yet so we waited, and waited, and waited.

       On Sunday August 5, 2012 your lolli came into town in hopes of your soon arrival. That night we went to bed normally and up to this point I hadn’t felt any sure signs that you were coming.

       Monday August 6th, we woke up at 5 am to get breakfast and take your daddy to work. After we took your dad to work we drove to Tehachapi to see Justine and sure enough, you began showing mommy you were ready to come out by sending contractions my way! By the time we got home a few hours later, I was sure you were coming.

       As I laid in the bathtub breathing through each contraction all I could think about was holding you, kissing you, nursing you, and I couldn’t help but smile even through the pain. Holding my belly through each contraction to see if I could feel you making your way out, but all I felt was my tummy hard as a rock. I knew you were working just as hard inside as I was outside and I knew we were working together to meet each other very soon. By the time daddy came home from work I was in active labor and we knew we would meet you very very soon!

       Daddy called Justine and told her that we were sure it was time and down the hill she came! I was sitting on the yoga ball inside the shower rocking and moaning when Justine arrived. I looked out of the shower and Justine gave me a smile and at that moment I knew it was safe for you to meet us!

       The minutes turned into hours, day turned into night and then day once again. Active turned into transition and I was exhausted and ready to kiss you all over. After walking the halls all night, getting in and out of the tub, up and down off the bed I looked at the clock in the bathroom and it was 7am on Tuesday, August 7. I knew it had to be soon! I had so many emotions and to this day I don’t recall any of them being pain. I was excited, scared, tired and anxious, but all of those feeling led to pushing.

       As I began pushing time stood still. I felt like I wasn’t progressing at all. I looked up at your daddy and he had a tear in his eye and in a soft voice he told me “babe, she has hair!” He was thrilled that he could see you! Even though it was just the top of your head, you were really there and you were really coming to meet us within minutes! Finally I reached my hand down to you and I could feel all that hair!! Feeling the top of your head gave me that much more power to help you make your way out to us! Lolli, Mimi, Daddy, Justine and I were all waiting patiently to meet you! You found your way out to us all and it is like no feeling I have ever felt. You were perfect. Perfect in every way. You were mine. You were daddy’s. Nobody could ever take you away from us.

       Elliana Madalyn Chavez I love you with every muscle of my body and my heart is forever yours! You, my baby girl, are the greatest thing that has every happened to me and August 7, 2012 will forever be my favorite day. You have shown me love like I have never seen before, and I hope that one day you will have this feeling. It is by far the greatest love in this crazy beautiful world.

​​

                                              ​​Love, Mommy

                    

                                                             My whole world

      

                                                        ...A tear in daddy's eye...

       

                                      Our midwife Justine checking our sweet girl out

        

                                                         8 lbs 2 oz of pure perfection

The best is yet to come

       As I reminisce on the last year of my life I could not be more grateful! I have been blessed with an amazing man who loves me more than I could ever imagine, a beautiful healthy little girl, and the most supportive family ever! Right now at this exact moment last year, nick and i were getting into bed for the very last time alone. I was 41 weeks + 1 day pregnant, as giant as could be, uncomfortable and had to pee every 10 minutes. The birthing tub was filled with warm water waiting for our sweet bundle to come at any moment, my mom had just gotten into town, and we were ready to have a baby! Except at this point I had NO signs of labor! My midwife kept telling me to get rest because labor usually comes in the middle of the night when you least expect it. Little did I know that would be my last night without my sweet girl. We woke up at 5 am to have breakfast and take nick to work. Before we left the house I was having small cramps that I wasn't sure if they were contractions or not so I just went about getting ready. During breakfast they began to get worse so I thought these could definitely be contractions. We took nick to work and headed up the mountain to have my last check up with my midwife. She checked my dilation and I was still only at a 2 (which I had been at for 2 weeks) I wasn't disappointed because my contractions were getting worse so we were pretty sure I was in labor! The drive home from Tehachapi is still a little blurry because I went into full blown labor. Contractions were consistent every 10 minutes. Luckily my mom was with me to drive home! We stopped and got lunch and by the time we got home I couldn't even eat my lunch because I was I'm so much pain! A few hours passed and nick came home from work where he found me laboring in the bathtub trying to figure out which labor position was the most comfortable at the time! He was bringing me cold wash cloths and rubbing my back! I was only 10 hours into labor...little did I know that I wasn't even half way there yet! 

                       (( I have my entire birth story written that I will post in a few days! ))

Xo,

       NursingBlissSleeplessMama

                     

                                                   Last pregnant belly picture

                                 

                                         Laboring in the tub & Nick rubbing my back

                     

                                                           So in love with him

As long as I'm living my baby you'll be

       Elliana and I have always had a beautiful breastfeeding relationship! Since day 1 she has LOVED nursing and it has always been our special time throughout the day. Now that she is creeping up to her 1st birthday she has begun the crazy toddler nursing stage... aka she wants to nurse and crawl at the same time...she wants to eat Cheerios, nurse AND crawl away to pick up toys all at the same time, which leads to teeth, biting, and my nipple being stretched further than it should be. As different as it is from our peaceful newborn nursing sessions, I love it just as much! Recently she has turned into a big daddy baby! She lovesssss her dada! All day long she yells "da da!" "Daaaa da!" And if I ask where daddy is, she stares at the front window waiting for him to walk in, so needless to say she's placed me on the back burner except when its titty time...then she's once again a mama baby! And I'm fine with that because I know how much he loves that she waits for him and it gives me a break once he gets home so it's a win win :)

       Tonight I'm lying in bed, nicks snoring away and I look down at elliana nursing and she just smiles...she didn't unlatch or anything just gave me a faint smile. As soon as I smiled back and told her I loved her, she closed her eyes and began snoring with her daddy. It 100% melted my heart. It brought back those beautiful newborn nursing sessions and the tugging and Cheerio biting of my nipples all day today has been forgotten. Although my baby is turning 1 next week I will forever cherish these moments. I plan to nurse until the very last day that my precious baby wants to (even though that day will probably be too soon for this mama's liking) and until that day comes we will nurse on and enjoy every minute of these crazy days and nights! 

  

Xoxo,

       NursingBlissSleeplessMama

            This is the look that melts my heart!

                         (11 months old)

                     Same look (4 months old)

Great Grandma Love

       Smiles, peak-a-boo, crackers and rocking chairs. Those are a few of my Elliana's favorite things when we are over at my Grandma's house. 3-4 days a week Elliana and I spend the day with Grandma Ruth & Aunt Lavada. We do laundry, we play with the hose & we sit on the porch swing and tell stories! We both love going over there to visit and help out but the thing that gets to me every time we go over there is the fact that my little girl can bring so much joy into someone else's life. I knew our sweet girl was loved, but the way my grandmother's face lights up when she sees us walk through the door is the greatest thing in the world. I never thought somebody besides nick and I could love her so much until I realized how she makes my grandma and aunt lavada's day each and every time we go over there! I think that's what makes Elliana so excited to see them is when she sees how excited they get she is ecstatic! She crawls all over the house waiting for them to chase her! She babbles nonsense and they babble back, they feed her crackers and they let her feed them, & most of all they snuggle her alllllll day long! She keeps them young and it melts my heart to see her bonding with them! My grandma always tells me how good it is for old people to be around babies because it makes them happy and I never took her seriously until recently when I realized they way they are with Ellie! They sit around the house all day long and when Ellie and I go over there, it gives them something to do and they talk about her until the next day when we come back! I love them so much and I love how they love my Ellie! I will forever cherish these days and moments with Grandma Ruth & Aunt Lavada!

        Xo,

              NursingBlissSleeplessMama